2017 So far...

Well, I started 2017 with an apparent bang.  The sort that you don't want:  I received the New Year in the ER, with the worst migraine and bad mental health symptoms.

So I started the year with a hospitalization.  It sucked, but it is what it is.  Health comes first, even if it means hospitalization on a holiday.

I'm still struggling with my faith.  In still in a relationship with the most awesome guy in the world.  I'm back at attending PRRC.  I stopped cosmetology school for the time being.

I've made a new friend, Laurie.  Been busy with my appointments at the doctor and the meetup groups I run.

I've been mentally hyper active, too.  I started a work website, http://www.webhelpstudio.com.  I also started a new blog, http://indiecraftistablog.wordpress.com.

Life is busy and I like it like that as looking as my mind is hyper.  We shall see how It looks when I crash.

2016 in quick review.

2016 was the start of this blog.  I had a vision for it that I haven't been able to crystallize.  It started about being all things Catholic, but I have a far more complicated life, or so it seems anyway.

So I have been working on evolving the idea, as well as a lot of many other personal goals.

2016 was a year I grew spiritually, but it still is a struggle.

I admire people who live and breathe their spirituality, their religion, their beliefs.  But it seems like no matter how hard I try, it just doesn't come naturally to me anymore.

There was a time I genuinely felt God's presence within me and around me.  Perhaps this is what Jesus and St. Therese the little flower mean when they say that the Kingdom of God belongs to little children.

But now there's a certain spiritual dryness.  I don't know if suddenly I'm "too grown" and unable to trust God so completely, as I used to.

There's more to this idea, but for now,  I hope you get the drift.

2016 was a year in which I made no resolutions, because I hardly ever keep to them.  But I think I learned a few things, meet new people, solidified friendship with a few others, and grew personally and as a couple with my boyfriend.

Right now, however, I am in a transition phase and I'm riding it as much as I healthily can.  2016 is ending in transition, and I'm hoping things will settle in 2017.

So, here's to a 2017 full of beauty and stability, health and prosperity.  And to resolutions we can follow. 😊

So in love, for 2 years now.

It has been 2 years since my boyfriend and I made our relationship official.  It has been 2 wonderful years, with highs and lows but mostly highs.

Dating long distance is not for the faint of heart, but we are making it work.  Hopefully, we will soon know when he's moving out here with me. ❤

Here's being thankful with 737 days under the belt and many, many more to come!

Thankful this winter.

I'm super late for my thanksgiving post.
As commonplace and standard as it may sound, I'm thankful for all the positive people and things in my life.  I'm thankful for a loving and understanding boyfriend, a wonderful, spunky son, and a small group of friends.  I'm thankful for a home and spending money, as well as food on my plates (with enough to share!)

But now, to talk about the harder things to be thankful for.  For example, my clutter (the bane of my existence).  While I have talked somewhat about how stressful it is, I'd also like to recognize that it is (unfortunately) a sign of a certain kind of abundance.  I'm also thankful for my medical conditions, as they allow me to appreciate the health I do have and the plight of other fellow #spoonies.  I'm also thankful for a crazy, stressful schedule of activities, as they are a reminder that I am utilizing the health I do have.

I'm thankful for the health I don't have, as it also reminds me that I need humbleness and the help of others to get through a rough patch in life.  Speaking of rough patches, I'm thankful for them, too. They remind me of how lucky I am to not be as lonely as my mind makes it out to be.

What are you thankful for?

It's been a while since I posted anything.

It's been a while since I have posted anything.  This is a check in post.  Life has had me busy.  You know, going to school, taking care of my son, attending Mass as frequently as possible, some of the usual. 

But I have been going through a period of spiritual dryness.  I have no doubt that God exists and that He is here with us, but I have been wrestling with doubts about my Faith and my life.

In spite of all this, I adhere to obedience.  I am somehow convinced that if there is a way out of this dryness is by obedience.  I attend confession somewhat regularly and I go through the motions, even though there hasn't been a lifting of the spirit at absolution, like I usually feel.    I attend Mass as regularly as possible and have even been to adoration.  Yes, I feel his presence, but something is missing and I don't know what.

I am hoping that my depression isn't robbing me from this communion, but it feels like doubt wins lately.

I struggle with so many things but I try to not worry and just be happy.  Be joyful.  And be not afraid.

There are many changes going on in my life right now.  Like I had said, I started school.  And my long distance boyfriend is about to become local to me (yay!)  I have a lot of stress but I keep Faith in the possibility that God won't burden my life with more than I can handle.

But I do have to figure out what about my free will.  Have I taken on more than I should have?  Have I made choices that have led me to this dryness?

It's all so complicated in my mind.  But obedience.  Being like a little child.  Trusting that God will provide.  It's all so hard.  But we must keep trying.  Right?

Being Grateful

In the world we live in, we are constantly bombarded by the idea that a better car, a better house, better clothes, better friends, etc. will bring us happiness.  But not very often do we stop to think to be grateful for what we already have.  Have you ever stopped to thank God for what you do have?  Your health, your job, your friends and family?  And how would being truly thankful for what you do have change your view of the world into one of happiness?

I have recently shared how gratitude and journaling about it has helped me with my depression.  While the change is a work in progress and has had its ups and downs, it certainly has forced me to look at what I do have in my life and to appreciate even the little things, because somedays - and we've all had those days - that's all we seem to have to be thankful for:  the little things.  And on the better days, be sure to stop and smell the roses and everything big you do have, because it is worth noting, too.

Once you start realizing what you do have and are truly thankful for it, it will be easier to eliminate clutter, live simpler, and enjoy more.  While my gratitude journey is far from perfect, I have been able to eliminate some clutter, and enjoy more of what I do have while living simpler.  I have a long way to go, but I can see the difference of where I was versus where I am and where I see myself going.

Who do we worship?

Do we really worship God?  Do we give Him his dues?  Or do we just roll around on Sundays, shut the alarm clocks, sleep "five more minutes" and then realize we are so late for Church and just have breakfast/brunch and watch a rerun on Keeping up with the Kardashians?

I know, it is so tempting to sleep in on Sundays, especially when Mass is offered so early in the USA.*  Especially when it seems to be the only day we can sleep in.  Or when it seems to be the one day we can really rest after spending Saturday catching up with everything else we didn't do during our busy weekdays.  I know.  I have been there.  I have missed Holy Sunday Day of Obligation because I was so busy just... catching up on some really needed zzzz's.

But who do we really worship?  It's one thing to miss Mass one day for whatever reason, and another to miss Mass because we're binge watching THAT show one Netflix or Keeping up with whomever!

Piggybacking on my post from 6/20/2016, Of Clutter and the Kingdom of God, are we really putting God first?  Just a thought to put out there in your mind.  I am not talking about clutter and stuff now.  I am talking about people you put above God.  You know, that TV show you follow.  Or that artist you just can't get enough of.

Are you putting them above God?  Are you missing Mass, not saying your usual prayers, looking at sinful stuff (yes, I am looking at you, 50 Shades of Grey fans and others) because you just think that Mass is boring?

Just remember that Mass is practice for Heaven.  Can we at least dedicate one hour a week to God?  That's all He asks from us, and He still doesn't usually get as much, but those soap operas, oh My Word, we are not missing them.  Oh my Lord.  We are not missing that opportunity to binge watch Game of Thrones (or whatever other show you binge watch)??

Just something to think about.  Most parishes offer several opportunities to receive Our Lord in the Eucharist in the Mass several times a weekend (with Saturday Vigil(s) included), and we still somehow just not plan accordingly.


*In Mexico, there used to be Sunday Masses as late as 1800h.